birthday wishes

happy birthday cory. i hope you are swimming a lot. eating lots of treats. and living it up pretty girl. hugs & kisses.

time

its not a good day. still missing cory. mom got the call that the ashes are ready. i am going to go see her this afternoon. i think tomorrow will be our family dedication. and what not. only time will help. i did watch some old footage the other night. watching cory run around and just be her. was actually comforting. i need to find some other videos from her first couple of years. the ones i watched were from about 7 years ago.

on a happier note. it is time. the event of the year. well there might be other events. but the most anticipated movie is premiering today. we are dressing up. drinking cosmos. and attending the 8:45 showing of Sex and the City: the movie. i have been told i can not critique the movie until every one who reads my beloved blog has had a chance to watch the movie as well. this will be tough. but i of course respect those wishes. and would never want to be the one to ruin the movie. i have cleared myself of the media. and am trying to walk into the theater with an open mind. and heart. and that i will fall in love all over again. (ha. sounds like a movie trailer).

sweet. gentle. giant

cory lynn love

this weekend has been extremely hard. i lost a family member. a best friend. our one and only family puppy dog.

my mom and i had just left a nice coffee/tea party with some of her classmates. her cell phone rang and it was brother. i thought it was odd. but not much. until she pulled the car over to the side of the road. and we stopped. he was doing most of the talking. a knot started to grow in my stomach. i remember she said something about 'she'. when she hung up. i asked what happened. through her tears she said cory had a stroke. she went to the vet. and is back home.

i went a bit hysterical. this was the last place i wanted to be. i couldnt stop saying how much i wanted to be with her. to hold her. like i held her the day we brought her home. and she shook the whole way from the breeder in iowa. it was up and down the rest of the weekend. mainly waterworks from me. i just couldnt stop thinking about her.

on saturday evening when i called. brother answered. i couldnt get a word out without choking up. he reassured me everything was going to be fine. she was getting better. his gentle tone. the familiarity in his voice. as he has said this to me many times before. i believed him. or i wanted to believe him. she was showing signs of recovery. we would see her on monday.

when i called back on sunday. after her second shot of steriods. my father answered. when i heard the tears in his voice. i knew it was not good. she hadnt moved. couldnt move. she didnt sleep. she was in pain. it was time.

he drove her to the vet sunday afternoon. in the truck. with as he says. her favorite song playing. puppy love. he had to leave her on the table. after he gave her a big hug. and told her that we loved her. we have her ashes coming to the house. where we will be able to distribute among her yard and favorite park.

it came so sudden. just wanted to be able to hug my bear one last time. to smell her. (as crazy as it sounds. i loved the way she smelled). to feel her fur. her soft ears with my face. to think of a new nickname for her. to lay her head on my lap and massage her ears. or rub her belly.

cory lynn love. came to us as unexpectedly as she left. she was just one month shy of her 13th birthday. as much as you think you can prepare. it never does make it easier.

cory. baby cakes. simba. curry. bear. and the many more names we had for her. we love you. and will blow you kisses in the wind. every chance i get.

excitement

it is in the air. i have some big things coming up in the next couple of weeks. things that keep me from focusing. sitting still for too long. make me jump up and down. stand on my chair. and scream. do cartwheels. stand on my head and spit nickels. (never understood that one). is it possible?

• going to granny's house this weekend (not looking forward to the long drive). but it will be some good qt time with pat. and granny. and bruno. i suppose. not to mention all the cousins. and pat's new vehicle has the ipod hook-up so we can listen to tunes. even when the radio goes out.
  
• sex and the city. movie. next week. aaahh. i can hardly wait. it better be good. otherwise. it might be a long time before i get this feeling of excitement.
  
• birthday celebration. same night as satc movie. cheers!
  
• actual birthday. which means dinner. drinks. ice cream cake. and presents.
• more birthday celebration for mother and cory lynn love.
• stacy comes back to ks for a visit

so over the weekend i sat out on a clients deck. it was after a day of volleyball. (all i wanted to do was spike. and slam the ball. in yo' face. my attempt was sad. but the ref laughed = success). anywho. didnt put on the ol' spf. stupid. this was one of the first times my chest had a full on sun exposure. i then looked like lobster woman. opposed to lobster girl from my childhood. so then on monday morning. pre coffee. trying to get my coffee. everyone who encountered me. decided it was a good time to point out. the obvious. oh. looks like you got some sun. what did you do. i kid you not. i mean it was just a little ridiculous the amount of people. so hadnt had my coffee yet. i dont like talking to people in the a.m. so i smugged them. made a couple of short comments back. and then proceeded to mock them. its sunny out. people get sun burnt. it happens. and i will never say this to someone. make the obvious comments of sun exposure. because as everyone knows. me = perfect. and i am done venting.

h

h is for...

happy hour. not because i am a lush. which may or may not be true. its more about the food. or the idea of being able to go to cool places that i wouldnt otherwise attend. i can afford to drink. eat. be happy. half off bottles of wine. cheap martinis. hors d'oeuvres. appetizers. all during those peak hours of the day. my only complaint about hh. is the times. i rarely can make it out of the office in time. it has to be a special planned event. or reversed happy hour. i always look forward to a nice hh. especially in the spring time. sitting out on the patio. with a refreshing drink. good company. a satisfied appetite. shed the winter coat. let the warmth of the sun cover your skin. and knowing summer is just around the corner.

hair. its kind of my thing. cutting it. growing it out. blow drying. coloring. curling. straightening. i love my hair. and all that comes with it. my girls describe my hair as doll hair the majority of the time. my hair has a natural wave. which i used to curse. that was before i learned how to style it. and work with what i have. i love the challenge of trying new things. new stylist. new product. sharing stories with friends. again. its my thing.

speaking of hair. here is a picture of cory from my trip home on easter. we were bored. she told me. waiting for my parents to return. i ate a cadburry egg. she was very jealous. i just mentioned they were not her friends. gave her a beef bone marrow treat instead. then we were both content. until i ate dinner in front of her. she sits right next to me while i eat. that is the next picture.

d

d is for...

dogs. i am immediately attracted to the k9 fur balls. the person who sees one walking down the street and lights up when i see a dog. i like to smile. talk to them. pet them. hug. kiss. love them. they bring me joy and happiness. here is a picture of my friends great dane. doby. i hope to get a great dane of my own someday. i would like to get a black and white one. name her vivian.


and i totally forgot to give a shout out to cory lynn love yesterday for c. cory is my family's chocolate lab. she has many nicknames. princess always seems appropriate. my friends also like to call her helen keller b/c she will try to grab food off the table. like helen would do in the movie. she is very much a begger. enjoys all human food. she is a beast. i had to beg and beg to get her. she is technically registered to me for her akc paperwork. but now that i have moved out. she is my parents baby. the glue that keeps them talking about when she goes #2 or if she had her pills for the day. cory is an old lady. getting ready to celebrate her 13th birthday in june. like me and my mom, she is a gemini. i dread the day that she will have to leave our family. but i know she will be happy eating treats. chasing balls and sleds. and swimming in her pool in puppy heaven.

dogsitting. has become my part time business. it started 3 years ago as a favor for a friend. she then recommended me to a friend. that continued. and has kept going through the years. it has also helped that i have switched jobs. as that always brings in new clients. as mentioned above. i just enjoy being around doggies and with my nurturing nature i get a great feeling while caring for others' dogs. i hope to eventually either open my own business of a doggy daycare or find a profession working with dogs. possibly a trainer. or a person who works with dogs on photo shoots or movie sets.

dancing. i feel this can best be explained in song. i've got rhythm. i've got music. who could ask for anything more. its in my soul. please read a past post 'the message' for more detail on my most recent dance adventure. i can dance anywhere and at anytime. it goes all the way back to my days in car seats. my dad claims he would put on "bird is the word" while in the car. i would go crazy. apparently i was a little rump shaker back in the day. now i like to shake my money maker. and my milkshake does bring all the boys to the yard.